Those who know me, know that I frequently talk about boundaries. That’s because when I realized I was depressed and not living the life I wanted was due to my lack of boundaries – I got serious about change.
In order to change you’ve got to do something different, right? Well, I knew I couldn’t go on living the way I was and expect to have this amazing new life.
The first change I experienced was setting proper boundaries. I had way too many people pushing me around. It’s as if I was the puppet and they were the puppeteer. My life was exhausting. A friend recommended I read the book Boundaries by Dr. Henry Cloud and Dr. John Townsend.
I was glued to the book. It wrecked me. In order to set boundaries I had to first dig through my past and discover the root. The root was an obsession with people pleasing. The root of my addiction to people pleasing was FEAR.
Damn that fear. It’s always up to something.
If you are feeling like your life is exhausting and you’re tired of everyone else living your life for you – maybe it’s time to get serious about setting boundaries (and ultimately pissing a lot of people off) as you journey to TAKE. YOUR. LIFE. BACK.
People do get mad when they can’t control you anymore but WHY would you want people close to your heart who want to control you? AND if they can’t control you they’re going to be mad at you? Who wants that?
Whoo! I feel liberty comin’ for ya, girl!
Why do we need boundaries? Well, for starters, healthy people set boundaries. Healthy people also respect other people’s boundaries.
Boundaries: I mostly talk about 2 major boundary zones. Emotional and mental.
What are boundaries? Well, I’ll let Psych Central tell you:
Emotional: distinguish separating your emotions and responsibility for them from someone else’s. It’s like an imaginary line or force field that separates you and others. Healthy boundaries prevent you from giving advice, blaming or accepting blame. They protect you from feeling guilty for someone else’s negative feelings or problems and taking others’ comments personally. High reactivity suggests weak emotional boundaries. Healthy emotional boundaries require clear internal boundaries – knowing your feelings and your responsibilities to yourself and others.
Mental: apply to your thoughts, values, and opinions. Are you easily suggestible? Do you know what you believe, and can you hold onto your opinions? Can you listen with an open mind to someone else’s opinion without becoming rigid? If you become highly emotional, argumentative, or defensive, you may have weak emotional boundaries.
Have you signed up for the 8 week course we offer through Point Her Journey for Setting Healthy Boundaries? I’d love to hear your feedback if you’ve signed up and completed the course.
If you haven’t signed up and are interested – it’s free! Sign up and let me know how it helps and or challenges you.
There’s a lot of noise on the internet. It is never my intent to say ‘look at me’ or ‘here’s some more junk to read.’ I’m extremely passionate about seeing women thrive in the here and now – with the life they have while creating the life they want!
I know what it’s like to live a life of bondage. I also know what it’s like to live a life of freedom. So, if there is anything I can share with you to help you live a life of freedom, I’m all for it! Let’s start with boundaries.
Click the here to get started with the 8 week course.
For those of you who already set boundaries, what was the most challenging part for you?
For those of you who have not yet set boundaries, what are you most afraid of?
I’m curious to hear your feedback about this complex subject.