My daughter has become a big advocate for kids that are mistreated by other kids. Of course I am so proud of her because I have always had a huge heart for the “misfits”.  I have zero tolerance for bullies and I have never understood why kids let other kids eat alone, play alone, or sit alone in school settings.

Although I grew up as a social butterfly, I still understand the heartache of being left out.

I grew up in a trailer out in the sticks … this was not cool growing up.  You had to live in a two story house in a subdivision.  The subdivision had to have the big rock entrance sign or it wasn’t really considered a “cool” subdivision and of course you had to have the coolest sneakers or you were lame.

My parents were not cool.  My dad was a mechanic, my mom a high-school dropout who worked in a warehouse … not cool.   They weren’t involved with my school or with other people’s parents.  Uncool.

In Elementary school the white shoes with the blue tag on the back… you know, KEDS, were super cool!  Well, Keds were a little more expensive than the Payless white shoes.  I had the Payless shoes.  Not cool.

I never felt like I didn’t have friends but I tried my hardest to fit inside of the more popular circle. I got my foot in every once in a while and was elated by the acceptance.  I felt like I belonged.

One day in 3rd grade, I was playing at recess and a group of “popular” girls, whom I thought I was actually friends with, walked up to me at the swing set and said, “April, we all feel like you are trying to be like us.  You are trying to copy us and … you really just don’t fit.”

I remember her words so vividly because certain situations that rock your world just stick with you.  It hurt.  It knocked the breath out of me.  I was inflicted with rejection and as a little kid you just don’t quite know what to do with that feeling.

Of course I remember them saying that to me but I don’t remember my response.  It could have been that I was silenced in hurt or … knowing me back in the day, I probably cussed them out (because you know us trailer park kids … we knew how to cuss!)  LOL!  Either way, I got my feelings hurt.  Bad.

I knew I didn’t fit.  My family didn’t have money.  My mom didn’t understand “style” or what was “in”… and even if she did she sure wasn’t going to buy that expensive stuff for me.

As I grew up I carried a piece of that conversation with me everywhere I went. I embedded it into my identity … “you just don’t fit.”  I didn’t fit.  A lot of times I don’t fit.  Even inside of church “circles”, I still don’t fit.

Now that I’m older I am so thankful that I don’t fit into people’s ideas or molds.  I was not made to fit in this cookie cutter society where everyone is following someone … who doesn’t even know where they’re going.  Good luck with that!

I am very passionate about teaching people to be comfortable with whom they are.  I know that’s hard, especially when you’re younger in school and surrounded by peer pressure and the need to be accepted.  It can be extremely tough!

I was always naturally drawn to the “misfits” and the “underdogs”.  I have always been drawn to them and them to me.  I’m a misfit myself and I’m okay with that.

Jesus was a misfit … and Jesus is pretty cool.

Misfits are full of treasure and I feel sorry for anyone who has belittled or bullied such magnificent beings.  This world is so twisted and we can easily become little minion robots if we are not rooted to the Truth of Jesus Christ.  We have to be anchored to Him and Him alone.  You have to receive your identity from Him and Him alone.  This world will toss you around like a rag doll if you don’t get anchored and stand firm.

Ha! I mentioned church “circles” earlier… what an oxymoron! *Shaking my head*

Just so you know  – the curser has been sitting here for a few minutes blinking at me while I read that line above over and over again, shake my head, and laugh with unbelief.  So stupid.

Again, Jesus … Hello PEOPLE … have you met Jesus?  This is why we have to follow Jesus and be okay with not being accepted by people.

_____________________________RANT OVER**


You, my friend, don’t have to be accepted by people to be valuable.  You were made for a purpose.  God created you with such excitement.  He tailor made you just as you are for His glory.  He meets you where you are in your transgressions and He gently corrects you.  He doesn’t give up on you no matter how many times you get it wrong.  He pours out His love on you constantly.  You are treasured by your Heavenly Father.

*Throws hands up in VICTORY*



You may also be interested in reading one of my older blogs, The Island of Misfits.

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5 thoughts on “YOU JUST DON’T FIT!

  1. LOVE IT!!! I too was a misfit in school… I wore clothes from Sears outlet and Montgomery Wards because that is where my mom shopped… my dad was a truck driver and my mom was a stay at home mom… my mom was cool to me- she was a left over hippy and instilled that love and peace lover into me… I feel lucky to have had the childhood I did – but also I was teased alot at school because I was different… I was a drama nerd, band geek and church geek but you know what – I didn’t care and that drove the popular kids batty… of course at the time I wasn’t happy with the bullying and torture at school… I hated it… but I’m glad I continued being me regardless… I can still remember my parents refusing to pay $25 for Jordache jeans ($25 was the entire back to school clothing budget)… so I saved up my allowance to buy my first (and only) pair… I can see my mom’s face in today’s world with the jeans that are over $100 and saying NO WAY!!! We would definately be shopping at Goodwill just like I do now… ok enough ranting from me – but great blog April!!! keep them coming… and kiss that sweet girl Trin for me – I love her for being HER and standing up to bullying at such a young age!!!

  2. I was never a misfit nor mistreated by others however, sometimes I fell into the temptation of pressuring myself to be someone else because every body are like that.

    But I thanked God that He showed me that I shouldn’t be sad for not being like the others, that I shouldn’t put so much pressure on myself. That I should love myself for being me because He loves me no matter what.

    Thanks to this post!

    • Thanks for your comment! I know what you mean about pretending to be something you’re not. I have done this as well. I have tried to make myself fit into the mold and I was never happy. There is freedom in being YOU!

  3. Pingback: I Did Not Survive “The Mommy’s Group” | April Poynter

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