The Island of Misfits

Have you ever felt like you don’t belong?  Even in a room full of people, you just don’t fit?

Have you been pushed out of circles of “friends” because you’re different?

Oh boy! I know all about feeling alone.I know all about being a misfit.

My husband made a joke one day about me being on the island of misfit toys. You know, the toys that weren’t good enough so they were tossed away?  We laughed about it but you know me … I can write a blog out of anything and the Holy Spirit so often asks me to write those blogs out of the most random things so I obey.

When you get a bunch of misfits on an island together you get a pretty interesting crowd.  Usually a lot of brokenness remains, fear of abandonment and rejection hang over you, and the need to wallow in your sorrows may arise… but the coolest thing about the island of misfits is that you’re surrounded by a community of others who “didn’t belong”.  … they didn’t make the cut … they didn’t live up to the world’s standards.  So the question is are we really the misfits?

When I used to run with my worldly friends (whom said they were Christians) I will never forget one night at dinner during a girl’s night out, the group made a joke about how I was “a little too much” when it came to talking about Jesus.  They all agreed and laughed about how I just wouldn’t shut up about Him.  I was a complete misfit in this group but continued to try to make the relationships work because I feared being alone and without “friends”.

Once you spend a year of your life bound in captivity through anxiety and depression and you OVERCOME your tolerance changes. I finally let go of trying to fit and found myself on the island of misfits.

I’m proud of who I am and where I am.  I have accepted who I am.  I am confident and secure in who I am and who God has called me to be.

I met other misfits on the island and they’re pretty amazing! They know who they are and where they’ve come from.  They are genuine and kind.  They love deep.  I see Jesus in their hearts and they accept me – even the ugly pieces.

If you have found yourself on the Island of Misfits, take heart … you’re exactly where you’re supposed to be.  Don’t wallow in sorrow – check out the community around you.  I’m sure you’ll find some pretty amazing jewels and never regret being a part of a community that just doesn’t “fit” in this world.

Be free!

– A Proud Misfit (in this world)

Expand Your Vision

Image

The other day I met with a local pastor in the community and I honestly feel like my life has been changed from one conversation with him.

Do you ever feel like you get caught up in the silliness of people?  You know, the drama… the criticism, the comparison, etc?  After meeting with this pastor I realized how small my vision can be.

This pastor is so focused on serving and helping others that his vision is HUGE! I’m not saying he doesn’t get caught up on the hurt of people not supporting him, or the comparisons of our flesh … but I could feel the excitement coming off of him because he serves constantly.

If you take a look at the Gospels and see how Jesus lived His life on earth – it was to serve.  In fact, He mentions constantly in the Bible how we should be serving.

If we’re not serving we are robbing the earth and ourselves of something GREAT!

When I went through anxiety and depression I read somewhere (sorry I can’t give credit to the author because I read so much during that time that I just don’t remember) that if you’re suffering from depression you should serve.  Everything in your body will go against it but do it anyway.  Your focus will go from being all about you to serving others.  I tried this and it worked! I most definitely did NOT want to do it but once I did – my vision changed.

We have to remember that the devil doesn’t just want us to worship him instead of God.  If the enemy can render us useless on this earth, he’ll take that.  If we go ball up in our beds, cover our heads, and stay there all day – we don’t lose our salvation but we’re being ineffective in our walk and in our purpose in life.  The enemy will take that.  If he can keep you miserable or caught in the silliness of people – he’ll take that too.

Let’s expand our visions.  Let’s serve one another in love … and let’s watch AMAZING things happen in the world and in ourselves.

God is good – ALWAYS.

Be Free,

April

Some People Won’t Love You

Guest post by speaker and author, Teasi Cannon

Image

A friend of mine posted this image quote on Facebook today, and being the “assume-the-worst-until-proven-better” person that I can sometimes be, I honed in on that first part right away.  “Some people won’t love you…”

Some people won’t love me.  No matter what I do.

Enter pit in my stomach.

I don’t like that pit.  First of all, it feels a little like getting the wind knocked out of me, and second…it makes my Oreos start singing, “Don’t, don’t you want me?” (Thank you, Human League).  And even though I still fall for it sometimes, I have learned enough to know that sugar therapy doesn’t always help :)

I also don’t like that pit because it shines the light on a not-completely-healed part of my heart…the people pleasing part.

And to a people pleaser, the words, “Some people won’t love you,” are not at all easy to hear.  In fact it can take years of healing and growth to be able to read those words without a physiological response such as my “pit” or even a small bit of nausea.  The thought of there being people out there who don’t love (or even like) me isn’t fun AT ALL!

It’s not fun because I really just want to be loved.  Because I really want to be understood.  I want to be accepted.  I want to be connected.  I want to be affirmed.  Approved.  Validated.  Enjoyed.  Don’t you?

It’s not wrong to want these things.  It’s just wrong to NEED them… from people.

When we don’t get something we NEED, we get sick.  Without water, my body will get sick.  Without food, my body will get sick.  Without affirmation, my heart will get sick.  Without love…heartsick.

Why can’t we expect to get these things from people?  Well…

  • People are broken: For me to expect someone who is also hurting and dealing with his or her own daily issues to be perfectly able to affirm and love me is just silly.
  • People fail: Even the most well-meaning, highly educated, incredibly spiritual people blow it.  Heck…if I take my eyes off others and put them on myself I don’t have to look far to see that I fail all the time.  I don’t always say what I should.  I don’t always call when I should.  And if you include what I think about…yeah, I can seriously blow it.
  • People are limited: People aren’t up all night or around me every second of the day, and I have my needs ALL THE TIME.  I feel sorry for the person who actually could meet my needs.  Ugh.

Even though I know these things, sometimes I foolishly hold out hope that maybe there is a way for me to get all people at all times to like me.  If I only alter my behavior just a wee bit.  If I move to the left a little more.  If I dance just the right way.  Maybe, just maybe they will like me this time.  Maybe they’ll want to hang out with me…invite me…enjoy me.

But it’s futile.  Not all people are going to love me.  And if I keep holding out hope that they will, my heart will remain sick.

The remedy?  God!  God is the only One who can perfectly meet our needs.  Listen to this:

  • He promises never to leave you or forsake you. (Deuteronomy 31:8)
  • He promises to always, always love you. (Jeremiah 31:3)
  • He wants you to be a part of His plan. (Ephesians 2:10)
  • He thinks about you all the time. (Psalm 40:5)
  • He promises to meet ALL your needs. (Philippians 4:19)
  • He’s not giving up on you ever. (Philippians 1:6)

These truths equal freedom from that stomach pit…and freedom from falling into a pit of depression, anxiety, and despair.  We need to repeat these verses over and over.  I think it is even okay to say that we should obsess on them!

Before I end though, I do want to say something about that last part of the image quote: “Some people WILL love you…”  Oh, that is such good news.  No, not everyone will love me, but some people will…and those people are a gift – straight from the heart of that very God who wants to meet all my needs.  He blesses us with great people in our lives – often times our parents, children, or siblings – who put up with us no matter what; who are willing to watch us blow it over and over again yet still find the beauty and treasure within us.

The older I get the more thankful I am for those people who hang in there with me.  Like I mentioned before… I can be quite the goober, and I am constantly in need of grace.  Which reminds me of one last scripture:

Matthew 19:19: Honor your father and mother, and…you shall love your neighbor as yourself.

With that in mind, I’ll end with this statement:  I know that not everyone loves me, and that’s okay.  Because God does.  And…if you’re one of the folks who don’t love me, I extend to you the very grace I so desperately need:)

 

Teasi’s personal journey with God started at the bottom, and skyrocketed…well, in part, because of her bottom.  After years of hating her body, especially the size of her lower half, an ironic chain of events led to a beautiful untangling of understanding and hope. Now a respected speaker, women’s ministry leader and writer, Teasi delivers an inspiring message to all women—one of healing and godly empowerment.

Check out Teasi’s website and Facebook page! 

http://teasicannon.com

https://www.facebook.com/teasicannon?fref=ts